008 In the Cracker Barrel Dumpster

... i found a bag. Red white striped I opened it, gag! Mummy dead bizarro dressed in a Inca rag. Call on into work quick. Tell em that i'm seasick! - The Fiery Furnaces

After falling so in love with the music of The Fiery Furnaces, so much so that i just had to buy every single one of their records, singles and all, while i was on the Braid tour, i finally got to see them live last night. And I have to say it was downright confusing. Now, i sorta knew what to expect. A medley. That's the way they roll. One song, forty five minutes long, no breaks. And during this very carefully crafted forty five minute song, you can expect bits and pieces of the vocal melodies of a few of the verses from parts of the the songs that you love. You see how this can be one big shoulder shrug? Somewhere in the mess I distinctly heard the vocals for the second and third verse of "Tropical Ice-land," but the music was completely different (than both versions) and nowhere near as catchy. They played three verses of one of my faves, "Evergreen," the first sounded relatively normal and then they dropped the key to like Z-Flat for the second two verses and the vocal melody was so deep for Eleanor that it really just disappeared. Then in a complete flash, it was off to the third verse of "Crystal Clear." At one time, i noticed that the bass player was playing "Quay Cur" while Eleanor was singing "Crystal Clear."

I dunno. I can't complain too much because i knew it would be like this. You have to give them credit for remembering a lightning fast 45 minute song, but at the same time, they all looked like... they were trying to remember a lightning fast 45 minute song. I don't think any of them smiled once... except for when the song was done. The bass player and drummer left the stage and Matt & Eleanor played three new songs from start to finish that were really impressive. Finally, their trademark beautiful vocal melodies, the carnivalesque piano lines, and some audible lyrical wordplay. I loved it. And so did they. And so did the crowd... I just don't know. I guess my final thought is: their records are really great. I'd suggest Gallowsbird Bark and EP before Blueberry Boat, but the latter will certainly grow on you. And another thing... either don't get used to what you hear on the CD's, or don't go see The Fiery Furnaces play. You'll leave upset.

Ugh, I'm thinking of more stuff to say about The FF. I remember this time when i was young and at my cousin's house and he had just received a saxophone as a Christmas present or something. He was so excited to show it to me and play some of the hot tunes that he had learned. He boldly asked, "What song do you want to hear?" I boldly replied, "Who Can It Be Now?" (which was a big hit at the time). And he said, "Awesome. That's my specialty," and proceeded to bleat out something that sounded like a trio of car horns beeping at a herd of goats (can you hear that? and goats are in herds, right?). He even sang a little. "Who can it beee now? (sound of car horns) Who can it beeee now? (sound of a goat yelling) Who can it beeee now? (sound of someone hitting a cat with a baby)" I had to say "Wo, wo, wo... Um, that is NOT Who Can it Be Now." And if i was paying for that mockery of a sham of a mockery, i would demand my money back. That's sort of how i feel now after the FF show.

Detroit is going mad with Fast Food Fever! The mayor has suggested a tax on fast food (i think maybe 5%?) to help offset the massive debt and the public is saying no way, Kwame. The radio is on in the other room and just overheard some "man on the street" reactions to the proposal that were like "you keep your hands off of my Big Mac!" And they were serious. The people sounded desperate and in peril.

If you want a new cover, then here it is... at Sayrah.net. They do these really cool monthly "mixtapes" where you can download all of the songs. It's a great idea and I let them have the next cover. I won't tell you what it is. You'll just have to go to Sayrah and see... and for no extra fee, if you like, one of them will come to your photo shoot party, get impossibly wasted, stumble up to the only place where no one is allowed, and then vomit all over for good measure. It's like the Sayrah tag. You should be so lucky.

"Someone hitting a cat with a baby" is another Simpsons quote, by the way. Ugh, i'm still confused by the FF show. I feel as though my attention span has been severely diminished. Oh well, i'll still try and cover another topic...

Alton Brown. If anyone can convince me to take on some crazy recipe with complete confidence in my ability, it's him. And yesterday, I got the sudden urge to try and make cheesecake. What the hell? So I watched the Good Eats cheesecake episode in its entirety, took notes, and then hit the supermarket. I then, watched the dvd as i went through each separate step of the process. (You could imagine how the dvd remote looked after the cream cheese / sour cream / sugar mixture made its way all over my hands... and the floor... and the cat.) It gets pretty specific: after you bake it for an hour, you turn off the oven, open the door for a minute, leave it in there another hour, and then refridgerate it for 6 hours! After all of that work, i was psyched to come home after a confusing evening and dig in. But it was a little soggy. I think that some of the water from the oven bath somehow leaked into the cheesecake pan. I'll try it again sometime soon... and take pictures.

For now, i'm going to make my famous fake bacon omelette and call it a blog.

Clog in the torso shoot: frat parties, hard drives, Sideways, Screeching Weasel, Monk, Lil vodka bottle, Miss Congeniality, Photos of Louisville, Stuffed artichokes, Proofreading, Jimmy Eat World's stage plot, Really bad t-shirt designs, Iron & Wine...